Shirley is my middle name after my grandmother, the cancer-fighting, music-loving, garden growing, swim to the bottom of a pool with a 10 pound weight and only one arm because the other was amputated but she had to get that lifeguard certification, bearer of 9 healthy children, pioneer kind of woman. The kind of woman you want to be intimidated by because of her depth, skill and grit but you just can’t because she was a friend to all.
Eliza Pickney, Betsy Ross, Florence Nightingale, the list goes on. People that see a need and fill a need and embrace a challenge head on! These are the people’s shoes we fill, I fill. I’m forever inspired and motivated by them. They get me up in the morning. They’ve given me an unhealthy obsession with productivity and production. These people are kindred. My grandma was one of those people. My mom is one of those people. There’s people in our lives past, present and future that have something oddly familiar about them. Find them, get to know them. Be inspired by their curiosity, dedication and grit, I am!
I consider myself an eclectic person, jumping from topic to topic and learning each skill just good enough to get by. Right now I’m enjoying sewing, baking, cooking (they are VERY different) , photography, gardening, designing clothes, wedding dresses and costumes. I love teaching my babies new words and I surprise myself with my dedication in teaching them American sign language and music.
I was fiercely determined as a teen that a woman was good for more than making sandwiches in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant, sadly (or maybe fortunately š) those are the things I’m good at… and slowly…becoming very passionate about! I’m fiercely loyal to my worrier of a husband and to my family.
Hearth and home, milk and honey, the sweet and salty, it’s in the simple, slow and tender sort of things that I’ve found peace, comfort and kindred spirits.
There are a few things to know about me.
One is that both my first and middle names come from books.
Second is that I’ve read those books and I love them like theyāre part of me, because they are.
Third is that I believe in knowing the things you like.
Things I like consist of books, chocolate chip cookies, swimming in deep ends with goggles and watching people in a sort of creepy but mostly non creepy way, canoeing in giant lakes, laughing so hard your stomach hurts, talking about books, knowing other languages, buying random costumes at thrift stores, watching historical dramas, making timelines of English royalty, wearing plaid, playing the Hardanger fiddle, learning the bagpipes, taking photos of things that have meaning, Jewish History, meeting people that seem to understand what the heck is going on all the time, reading books I don’t understand, watching what books people choose to buy at bookstores, listening to Hilary Hahn play Bach Chaconne (and yes it does have to be Hilary Hahn even though I love you too Itzhak Perlman,) choral singing, sitting in libraries, discussing the deep meaning behind Harry Potter, ranting about why Harry Potter has every right to be mad in book 5 Order of the Phoenix, drinking smoothies, dramatic weather, making sugar free desserts that don’t taste like black beans, thinking about why people name books the way they do, studying about early Scandinavian life, looking at old photos, Anne Shirley and Gilbert Blythe, the paintings of Van Gogh, listening to the Music Man on a record Player, Watching Shakespearean plays, writing run on sentences like this one, tasting cheese covered things around the world, running in places that are beautiful, early morning hiking, Swimming in lakes, baking with pumpkin (yes I’m one of those people,) trying to figure out where to put commas in a sentences, reading about Sir Ernest Shackleton, twisting my ankles on cobblestone streets in Europe (I’ve learned to accept the severe weakness of my ankles,) giant rainstorms, and books, in case I didn’t mention it before.
I’m ending the list here not because I feel like it’s finished but because it’s getting a little long.
As I said, I believe in knowing the things you like, and I think others should know those things about themselves too. This, to me, is what defines a kindred spirit. Someone who knows all the small little quirky things about themselves because “what are men to rocks and mountains?” …. I’m kidding, that’s just a random quote from Mary Bennet in Pride and Prejudice that has nothing to do with what I’m saying… What I mean to quote is from one of my favorite college mentors which is to “never despise the lowly fact.” It is the lowly facts that make people who they are and that is where we find all the meaning.
You may know me by my sometimes-Shirley-Temple, sometimes-homeless-vagabond curly hair. Despite itās blondeness, I absolutely love discussing, developing, and tirelessly typing up my thoughts and ideas. The quest for truth is one of my greatest driving factors. I love learning and achieving. It’s why I played soccer through High School even though I was pretty much no good at it, it’s why I picked up the flute at age 15 and had to do humiliatingly juvenile rhythm drills for a year, it’s why I love public speaking despite disappointments, it’s why I served as a missionary for a year and half despite the challenges I faced, and itās why brownies are still the bestā¦.wait what? I forgot…we werenāt talking about brownies?!
Today, truth seems to be complex, contradictory, and mighty. Yet, itās so often found in the people right in front of us…our cousins, siblings, and friends. Our parents. Our mentors and favorite authors. It can be found in the cultures of our ancestors, philosophies of greeks and romans, or words written by a humble pen bearer. Truth is found in kindred spirits.
You may even say that truth is what makes us kindred.
This learning and achieving is part of my quest to find out what is true. It is how I live that truth.
Thatās part of the reason why brownies are my favorite food, because the truth is that they are the best dessert on the entire earth and no one can refute that….Sorry not sorry Candance Nelson.
Iāve had the opportunity to play instruments from a young age. Iām pretty good at the piano and learned the acoustic guitar around the age of 10 although I will admit, I wrote some pretty sappy songs. Lyrics include but are not limited to, āStanding aloneā and āIn Loveā I’m sure you get the idea, but I did actually write a song about Pumpkin Pie, because pumpkin pie is amazing! Which was pretty good if I do say so myself! This path led me to find the classical guitar and a whole new world of classical music that I love to play and listen to!
Iām currently attending a school of botanical medicine because I love plants and their healing properties and I hope to someday become proficient in garden design.
I have found that when we find an appreciation for fresh basil from your backyard on a homemade crust, instead of a fast-food pizza that can be ready in five minutes, and the fond smell of homegrown tomatoes instead of the potent scent of crispy cream donuts, or the heat from a pinch of cayenne instead of the spike of energy from an energy drink, we are more conscious content, and quick to recover from the ails of this world. We not only become more physically healthy but emotionally and spiritually present and content.
I’m happy with the results from the revolutionary war and all, but I will admit, I am sad we chose not to keep the English tradition of keeping and caring for a garden. I am a firm believer that every person needs a personal sanctuary, a place to ponder, think, and get away from the insanity of our world. In essence, I believe that everyone needs their own secret garden to recover physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
To be Kindred means we donāt speed through life, but embrace and seize every moment. Donāt stress the drive-through food that is ready in 5 minutes or run through man and Godās conservatories, slow down and take time to appreciate the simplicity, and yet somehow, the complexity of the world we live in.